I’m not a fittie

Posted by SuperClydesdale on November 1, 2011 under Commentary | Be the First to Comment

People with willpower disgust me.  And, people with crazy, silly levels of willpower worry me.

Some of the simple pleasures I enjoy in life are good beer and good wine.  And cigars.

This year, one of my primary riding partners decided that he was going to give up alcohol.  Entirely.  I’d rather hang myself.

He revealed his move one day after a ride, when we normally go grab a beer to celebrate a good ride.  “Oh, not for me, I’m not drinking anymore.”   I stared back at him like he had just grown a third eye or something.   I asked him what brought about this change… was he drinking too much?  Was his wife drinking too much and he was going dry in support of her?  Did the doctor tell him that he needed to make dramatic changes to his lifestyle?

Nope.  It was all for “fitness.”

Okay. ..  fitness…  I don’t get it.  This guy is never going to be a racer — he doesn’t even want to race.   Yet, he’s slowly removing things from his diet.   Big things.    He’s eating lots of veggies, very few breads, more “unprocessed” foods.  It’s like he’s going “paleo” – that pathetic new diet trend that has people wanting to go back to the good old days…  apparently, the “really good, really, really old days.”  You know, when life was so free and easy:  the Paleolithic era.   All that a guy had to worry about back then was the real basics of the  hierarchy of needs:  food, water, shelter.  And getting stabbed with a stick.  Or getting the flu.  Along with that crazy laid-back lifestyle went a life expectancy of probably 20 years or so.

I expect that he’ll give up fluoridated toothpaste soon in favor of salt, or ground up nuts or something.  Needless to say, my buddy has moved to my “second tier” of riding partners.  Last time I rode with him, he just went home after the ride rather than hang out.   Fun.

I confronted him somewhat on this whole fitness strategy.   I told him, he’s already pretty damn fit.  He’s probably easily in the top 1% of all Americans with respect to his fitness level for his age.  He’s going to have the Occupy Wall Street folks camping in his yard if he’s not careful.  Instead of protesting the capitalist gluttony of Wall Street, he’ll have an assortment of “the 99%” – other people not so fit, who will demand that he exercise less and drink more.  Maybe take up smoking.  He’s making them feel bad about themselves.    Interestingly, like at OWS, Michael Moore will show up at my buddy’s house as well.

At any rate, he’s gone way too far, stretching this arbitrary goal that he has towards a higher level of fitness, with no particular end point in mind.  Just more fit.  Whatever he is now, he just wants to be more fit.  There’s got to be a fitness equivalent to anorexia.  If there is, he’s developed it.   I googled “fitness obsession” and found an article on Fitness Bulimia.  While my buddy is not quite at that level, he’s headed in that direction, in my view.  Give up alcohol?  He might as well have sold one of his children.  Same level in my mind.

Me, I prefer to experience the breadth of things that life has to offer.  I drink wine, I enjoy a beer or two after a hard ride.  Or three.

I also enjoy the occasional cigar.  In fact, I recently joined a cigar club, where I keep a locker.  Like my old gym locker, this locker is humidified – but not by gym shorts.  This is a proper cedar-lined space, where I can store cigars and a bottle or two of my favorite Tequila, scotch, or my new thing, Japanese whiskey.  Yes, I want it all.  Life is short and I enjoy the ride.

For me, fitness is important.  And, like my buddy, I am in that top 1% as well.  Easily.  While I pant and wheeze trying to keep up with the little guys up a steep hill, I can pretty much ride the wheels off of the damn bike, even if I am heavier than I probably could be.

All things in balance.  Don’t take things so seriously.  It’s okay if you are not at 7% body fat.

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