Indoor trainers

Posted by SuperClydesdale on February 15, 2010 under Commentary | 6 Comments to Read

My team had its annual time trial this weekend.  The idea is to rank riders — to make sure everyone knows how they compare to others so that on a team ride, you know what you’re in for, and you (hopefully) don’t end up going on a ride that you won’t enjoy.  It’s a solid theory, but a mid-February time trial is brutal.  I’m not anywhere near where I was in the fall.  With this winter having been a particularly wet one, and with work limiting my ability to ride during the week, my conditioning isn’t where it would/could/should be.

I felt like crap by about the first mile into the time trial.  I’m sure my trainer-riding teammates were feeling better than I.

There are a number of people on my team that take to indoor trainers during the winter.  It gives them at least a good cardio workout and keeps their fitness level from dropping too much.  The indoor trainer for an hour several times a week, and then at least one road ride on the weekend, and you can keep yourself from slipping.

I’ve tried riding trainers.  I own a trainer.  I just can bear to get on it.  I think it’s a Clydesdale thing.  I cannot dissipate enough heat to keep from feeling like I’m melting.  The sweat just pours off, and by the end of the ride, I feel like crap.  Sure, a fan can help, but I’d need one of those aircraft-engine fans — like they use in indoor skydiving places —  in order to keep cool.   I might not be able to stay on the bike, but at least I wouldn’t overheat.

Last time I was on a trainer was early this winter, on a Computrainer (very cool).  They had a good-sized fan, and I made sure I was in the front row by it. The fan was one of those oscillating models, with the head slowing turning back and forth in front of me.  By the end of the session, I felt that the fan was out to get me.  I could swear that I wasn’t getting my fair share of the breeze.  It would cross over to me and I would get about 2 seconds of its breezy goodness, and then it turned away for what seemed like several minutes.  I was more fixated on that fan than I was the damn Computrainer terrain in front of me.

I think that the whole indoor training, spin-class, et al is just another cruel plot by smaller people to invent one more thing to torment us big guys.   The existence of trainers should raise some serious ethical concerns.

I’d rather be waterboarded than spend an hour on a trainer.   There are not many state secrets I wouldn’t cough up if it could save me from a 60-minute spin session.  If it would get me out of a 30-minute session, that’s probably good for my ATM PIN code.   For 15 minutes, I would kill a puppy.

I think that the indoor trainer should be seriously considered as an enhanced interrogation device.  While to the rest of the world it would appear that we were simply trying to insure the health and fitness of our detainees, we would be extracting some serious G2.

  • Marcin M. said,

    I remember that Computrainer session :) You must have been trying to “end it now!” because the wattage figures you were putting out were huge.

    I agree on the indoor trainer, however with all the wet weather we’ve had, it better than the alternative… slipping off the pedals for a few weeks, and starting Spring in crummy form.

    -Marcin.

  • Marcin M. said,

    I remember that Computrainer session :) You must have been trying to “end it now!” because the wattage figures you were putting out were huge.

    I agree on the indoor trainer, however with all the wet weather we’ve had, it better than the alternative… slipping off the pedals for a few weeks, and starting Spring in crummy form.

    -Marcin.

  • SuperClydesdale said,

    I agree with all the benefits. About 45 minutes into the session, I really feel like crap when I really start the overheating.

    There’s a lot of things that you can do that are good for you, most of which I choose to ignore.

  • SuperClydesdale said,

    I agree with all the benefits. About 45 minutes into the session, I really feel like crap when I really start the overheating.

    There’s a lot of things that you can do that are good for you, most of which I choose to ignore.

  • JC3 said,

    SuperClydesdale try a set of Al Kreitler rollers inside/outside; in your garage or on the porch; and get the blower. There’s real motion and balance here. Spinning with Al K takes indoor trainer paranoia to a better level and spring season outcome.
    Link: http://www.kreitler.com/about.php?section=about
    Cheers!

  • JC3 said,

    SuperClydesdale try a set of Al Kreitler rollers inside/outside; in your garage or on the porch; and get the blower. There’s real motion and balance here. Spinning with Al K takes indoor trainer paranoia to a better level and spring season outcome.
    Link: http://www.kreitler.com/about.php?section=about
    Cheers!

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